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I am no prophet, but I can pre-empt that am likely to solicit some negative attention from the recovery community for this controversial piece. I am convinced that in order to gain a full and complete recovery experience, it is imperative that I wholeheartedly express myself, leaving no stones unturned.
Some of you may have heard of a support group called Narcotics Anonymous, but to those of you who may have not, kindly allow me to enlighten you. Narcotics Anonymous is a fellowship for recovering addicts which was founded in 1953 by Jimmy Kinnon. The groups primarily focuses on providing support to its members by using the 12 step model, which contains, yes you guessed it; The 12 steps program and 12 traditions. These are designed to help those who are battling an addiction to overcome their struggles, and to encourage and promote abstinence to the addicts who are already on the recovery path.
THE FIRST STEP
My first exposure to this wonderful program was in 2017, when I was undergoing treatment for DRUG addiction at a rehabilitation. The program was instrumental in facilitating full acknowledgement and acceptance of a major, unmanageable DRUG problem and I was lured to its principles for remaining clean and sober.
The basic principle of the program is that there is therapeutic value gained when one addict helps another. To me, this principles carries so much weight and it essentially denotes that by helping someone else, you are inevitably helping yourself in turn because of the therapeutic effect that is inherent in being helpful to others. This, more so when those people are faced with a similar dilemma as one. Helping a fellow addict is redeeming of our own addictive experiences and liberates us from the burden of our own wrong doings.
During my rehab period, NA meetings were informally held, and I experienced first hand the power of one addict helping another through sharing their personal experiences or by simply listening to their “shares” with grace and without judgement. There’s tremendous, therapeutic value gained in sharing one’s story to a group of people who are faced with a similar problem and equally, listening to other’s stories is just as impactful. The fellowship’s primary message is that of giving hope and the promise of freedom from addiction. The new visitor is considered to be the most important person in a NA meeting, and this message of hope and freedom is passed on to the new visitors.
CRACKS IN THE WALL
The NA principles are all great, however in my view not without loopholes. I came to observe from a few meetings I had attended post my rehabilitation that the rules for implementation of these carefully constructed principles were not fully adhered to by certain members of the group. And subsequently, I personally felt that some rules were restricting to free and uncensored expression.
I without doubt understood the intended purpose of adhering to these rules, while I also felt that I could not be completely vulnerable with my addiction., For me, vulnerability was and still is key in the on-going process of remaining sober for the rest of my life. I also felt that some members of the group could potentially impact my sobriety negatively, because of certain habits they engaged in, which I strongly felt that in the long run would be a detriment to my recovery. Cigarette smoking, substance replacement, a lack of understanding the true nature of addiction, and naivety in subscribing to a notion that a God of their individual understanding will miraculously aid them from their addiction without putting in the required effort to stay clean, were some of the examples.
NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS IS FOR QUITTERS
Subsequently, I decided to stop attending the meetings primarily because of the reasons I’ve highlighted above. I’m not going to lie and say that a part of me does not miss being in the fellowship, because I do. I met some exceptionally great individuals, some of whom I am constantly in contact with to date, however due to my understanding of the fragility of my recovery, I had to refrain completely from the support group.
I humbly plead with everyone who is reading this article, particularly those who are battling an addiction and members of the fellowship to not misinterpret my stance. I am neither criticizing nor disapproving the fellowship’s methods in providing support to its members. I am simply stating that the one size fits all model didn’t work for me and probably others too. This became more evident when I began attending meetings outside of rehab. I felt totally disengaged due to certain practices and procedures from the support group, that I have become accustomed to.
THE LAST STEP
The 12 steps model was created in the 1930s, and as effective as it is to a great extent, I honestly feel that some of its strategies contained in the principles are outdated and do not model some of the challenges faced by the present day substance abusers. I truly think that current time professionals like psychologists, social workers, counsellors, medical experts etc., should individualise the recovery process through the recommendation of tailor made solutions that are best suited for an individual addict. Many addicts suffer from mental disorders which if exposed to a conducive environment, could trigger addictive tendencies and behaviours contrary to their wellbeing. All these factors need to be considered when recommending recovery solutions to the present day addict.
In addition, I have also observed how the NA meetings can pose a threat to women in recovery. Albeit against the policies of the fellowship, on occasion women tend to be viewed sexually by male members of the group. This is in violation of the “principles over personalities/gender” tradition and not to mention the prevalent element of toxic masculinity which is discriminating and demeaning to the female members of the fellowship.
In closing, I firmly believe the NA meetings are an outstanding platform to gain the much required healing and support for those recovering from substance abuse, equally I also feel the program could be revised to suit a larger demographic of addicts like those with mental disorders and those who became addicts as a result of being fed DRUGS against their will. As much as the program’s principles are based on spirituality, I feel that it should be open to incorporating irrefutable scientific data and methods to its strategies to provide holistic solutions to active and recovering addicts.
Recovery is and remains an ongoing process. In writing this I hope to inspire addiction recovery, an in turn inspire additional recovery.
Gugulethu ‘GK’ Khoza is recovering addict who has turned his life around and will regularly share his experiences to inspire and help young men recover from addiction. More of his stories to follow. Edited by Tumelo Mabua
This piece espouses a revered deep understanding of one’s path towards recovery, as the journey to recovery is bespoke to recovering addicts. A palliative approach to it will always be detrimental to the course.